Today's lecture focused on assault. While this differs from a class lecture on something about karate, I will be discussing many topics as they relate to assault, to help develop your overall skills in self defense....not just the physical skills, but the mental skills that are equally, if not more important.
There are many reasons why women get assaulted, however, most studies show that a woman gets targeted for assault for 3
MAIN reasons.
You might be surprised with the answers. No, it doesn't have to do with how
HOT the women looks or how
SEXY she might be dressed. And it's not about money or anger. These are all contributing factors, but they are not the main reasons. Oh,
AND yes, nearly 25% of all assault is female on man, so these rules apply to both sexes.
Reason # 1
Research shows the number one reason women get assaulted is due to
poor body language. In other words, how you walk, how you carry yourself when you are out in public is a large factor in determining if you get targeted.
Do you recognize yourself in this description?
Do you walk with your head down, your shoulders slumped, your chest in? Do you generally keep your hands in your pockets? Do you walk with purpose or just shuffle along at a slow pace? Do you make any eye contact?
Some people are under the impression, if they appear small, no one will notice them. Well, they are wrong and potentially inviting trouble!
Attackers are looking for people they believe will give them little or no resistance. The attacker wants to get in quickly, strike and take his victim to a secondary location without being seen or heard. They are looking for someone who appears to be weak, afraid or timid. Attackers are basically cowards and they don't want to attack anyone that they can't control easily! So, if you look like you might put up a fight, there is a good chance the attacker will pass on you.
Why do you think the elderly get attacked so often? Because a 90 year old is not expected to put up much of a fight if confronted! It's a miracle that they can even walk, right?
So, I want
YOU to start today, changing how you walk! I want you to walk with a purposeful stride, like you know where you are going and what you want. I want you to walk with your head up, shoulders back and chest pumped out! You are walking with some "attitude" and your body language is communicating CONFIDENCE!
You want to allow your arms to swing with each stride, as psychologically, this makes you appear to be larger than you really are. Plus, having your arms free allows you to react quicker if attacked.
Yes, I want you to make EYE CONTACT! The kind that says "
I know you are there and I am making sure you know I know....and by the way, I am not afraid of you" kind of eye contact.
Need more convincing? Just take a look around you and watch people walking in the grocery store or in the parking lot. I am pretty certain you will be able to spot the people who are confident and portray a very strong body language and the ones who don't.
One last note about body language. One of the most important aspects of walking with a strong body image is having your head up. This gives your eyes the ability to remain vigilant, constantly looking for potential danger.
Reason # 2
The second most common reason women get assaulted is
lack of awareness.
Are you the type that turns their back to the crowd when answering your cell phone? I know you are trying to be polite and make the conversation quiet and private, however, you are creating a perfect opportunity to strike.
Are you someone who likes to carry a big pocket book? I remember my mother carried this huge bag around that I could get lost in when I was a young child. Trying to find the car keys sometimes took days!
Well, I might be exaggerating, but you get my point. When you become focused on a singular task, that is the time that attackers like to strike.
How about sitting in your car texting or maybe updating your check book since you were shopping and purchased some items?
Another big NO, NO!
Walking into the rest room without checking to see if anyone was following you? Looking for something in the trunk of your car? Running the neighborhood with your Ipod at full blast and your earphones on both ears?
We live in a society filled with so many distractions every day, however, we MUST do all we can to be alert and aware when we are out somewhere and potentially vulnerable!
Reason # 3
Being in the
wrong place at the wrong time!
We can't always control this, but we need to be aware and try to avoid places that could potentially be dangerous. For example, the roof of the parking garage at the mall late at night, say during the Christmas holidays, when the stores stay open late. Conversely, parking in the basement of a downtown parking garage. Parking far away from the football stadium in a poorly lit parking lot. Leaving your place of work by yourself late at night.
If you live in a city, walking down a dark alley!
Hopefully you get the picture.
I feel like you can't always prevent this, because sometimes there are circumstances beyond your control (getting a flat tire on a country road or highway); however, be mindful of potential areas that you would be vulnerable in and avoid them to the best of your ability. Try to leave work with a friend or make arrangements to have someone pick you up. Be patient and search for another parking spot that isn't so far away or in an area that has better security. Don't try to change that car tire. Call a family member or friend for help.
The Big Three
Attackers pick their victims for lots of reasons and there is
NO way to predict with 100% accuracy how to avoid an attack. However, research has shown the above reasons to be the 3 most consistent reasons given by attackers that were caught.
If you work on creating a confident and strong body language, maintain a high alert level at all times and avoid areas that could represent trouble for you, then you will go a long way towards helping yourself stay safe!
Sensei Chris Feldt
2000 Clemson Road
Suite # 9
Columbia, SC 29229
803-462-9425
samuraikarate@bellsouth.net
By Susan Murphy-Milano
